For the bride-to-be...

So wedding season 2011 doesn't begin until August (for me, at least). But when it hits, it hits hard. I have three weddings to attend in a seven-week period, all of which I am serving as an attendant, and then a fourth a month or so later. And with all of this marital bliss comes the prerequisite showers and bachelorette parties and calls for advice to the bride-to-be.

And so, dear readers, I've been feeling rather nostalgic these past few weeks. Thinking back to my own wedding, our engagement, and the few years preceding those events of getting to know each other, becoming a couple, renting our first apartment, renting our second apartment, renting our third apartment, adopting two cats, renting our fourth apartment, buying a house, adopting two dogs, having a baby... And building a life zoo together, in general, over the last seven years.

Which brings to mind my single most important piece of advice for any woman in a long-term relationship of any kind:

Say what's on your mind.

I spent the first five years of my relationship giving the silent treatment or otherwise sulking when I was upset (which wasn't very often, I should add). It's a familiar scene in our daily lives: The woman who refuses to offer anything more than "Nothing," or "Do what you want. I don't care." And all the while, she is silently seething and spewing venom with her eyes. It could last for hours, or I could stretch it out over a number of days, before it finally erupted into a huge burst of pent-up nags, complaints, criticisms (not the constructive kind) and other types of nastiness.

I'm not sure exactly when or how, but one morning it suddenly dawned on me that no matter how long I kept this up, Mr. Zookeeper was never going to be a mind reader. Even if I was really, really good at the sulking part. Turns out, his ESP skillz are completely non-existent. And my guess is your boyfriend/husband/best friend/lover/life partner/running buddy/hairdresser/dog is similarly lacking in the mind reading department.

So, if something is bothering you, why not save yourself five hours (or days) of forehead wrinkles and eye rolls and just tell the person you love what's up. In today's technology-driven world, you can even text them. And who doesn't welcome the challenge to whittle a nag down to 140 characters or less?

One more thing: Once you've aired out your grievances, why not do your guy (or gal) a favor and let them know how to fix it? No sense in building a dog house without a door, eh?